When someone is the parent in a divorce that doesn’t get the primary custody of the children, every other week is a reminder that the consequences of some mistakes will linger for days or months or years.
Maybe a lifetime.
In a normal month, I see my sons the equivalent of four days. Friday night to Sunday afternoon twice a month. It’s hard enough to go through most of my month with only a few minutes on the telephone with them but when I have to physically drive them back to their mother for 12 days it crushes my soul.
The hour plus drive is hard but at least tolerable because of the noise that comes from the back seat. The sound of video games. Questions about the deadliest snakes in the world. YouTube videos playing on my phone. Requests for chicken and french fries when we drive past any McDonald’s.
It’s the drive back that hasn’t gotten any easier.
Six inch cleats.
Every glance in the rear view mirror where I don’t see two little heads back there is a reminder of the mistakes of the past.
If you’re not a divorced parent, you may not be able to relate to the powerful feelings that get me twice a month. However, there’s a good chance if you stop and look at your life you’ll find places that you see lasting consequences to decisions. Consequences that come up to bite your soul at the worst possible moments.
Now, I know you’re likely hoping I can tell you a way to get past it.
I can’t because I haven’t been able to get past it.
But I’ll tell you what’s helped me get through those hard moments that won’t go away. I take that time to stop and realize the mistakes that cause the pain I may be feeling are lessons that I learned to improve myself going forward for myself, my friends, my family, my co-workers and my church.
As long as you’re not like the puppies of Proverbs 26:11, you’ll be able to move forward using that technique and avoid adding to the list of unending consequences.
What consequences do you have to repeatedly face in your life?