As a wife, mom, step mom and entrepreneur there is a continuing fight at our house. The fight to find perfect systems for stability of all resources. ( of course there is no perfect world, but isn’t it great when you find systems that work and fit your life!) Whether its time management, physical exercise, emotional balance, or financial peace, if we’re not careful to set boundaries, our lives simply get out of whack. We get to feeling isolated, irritated, or simply out of sorts if we’re not protective of our head and hearts.
Today’s family faces so many interruptions daily to time together. It’s easy to get caught up in the “gotta do it now” mentality of real time media. If that wasn’t a strong enough pull, we now have on demand media such as netflix as well. Les and I are as easily led astray as everyone else. The last year we’ve seen more meals in the living room instead of the kitchen table. In the past that simply didn’t happen, we took time to stop and dine as a family. We had always had a Thursday night chef night in our home where each child rotated the week of being the “Chef with a friend” for the rest of us, it had been a wildly fun thing for us, but we simply stopped when priorities weren’t kept. Teens were more willing to hang out when food or breakfast was involved. We believe supporting the food bill for gathering is more economic than supporting teens who aren’t involved with parents at home! Funny thing, fuddy duddies that we are, their friends all clamored to be the “Chef and Guest”….it became a way to minister to teens and adults who needed “family.”
We’ve skimped on family night focused times together in the last year and we’ve pretended not to notice cell phones ever present in our conversation times at home. It didn’t serve our children or ourselves well. Our recent days away reminded us how important it is to make time for what is important. We know that food is one common denominator for bringing our children and our own friends together…and its so much easier and less expensive than dining out. The true bonus for us is its time to have fellowship, to hear and be heard, to learn and understand each other better as family and as friends. We help each other grow.
We started our Fourth of July Indpendence Day by remembering fellowship begins at home….and cooked up kabobs for a crowd to enjoy at home. After all, friendships, fellowships, and family all begin by taking the time to know one another.
Stability.
I think we all take for granted that our bodies, our minds, our families and our friendships need us to take time for them. We manage to plug into our computers, Twitter, Iphones, Ipods, our Facebook, and our chargers (all of them!) but how often do we plug into God? To our families? To our friends? To our spouses? At our home we’re launching Tuesday nights at home this year. It won’t always work because of ball games, or school PTA, but Tuesday night’s we’re working on systems for stability in our family. Talk time. Game time together, Skating or Tossing the ball in the yard. As parents of children 15 to 25 with a new one in our household expected later this month, we know the best system for stability is time together, and tme together at the end of the day or activity taking a moment to pray together to thank God for the time.
What is a system that supports you or the folks in your world?
We love SYSTEMS in our house (or at least I do) and the one that you described here rocks! We have a family night each week and the children really look forward to it!
Sarah, I am so humbled by the ease and intelligence of the systems you have in place for your family. Thanks for always being willing to share your great ideas!
hugs!
Sweetie
Great title, Sweetie. “Systems for Stability”
Maybe also known as rituals–activities to count on and look forward to. Scaffolding for our calendars, maybe even for our psychological lives, in some ways.
Nice.
Blessings on implementation!
Thanks so much Karen, you have modeled making wiser choices in every facet of business as I’ve watched your success. I value your lead and example.
hugs!
Sweetie
Sweetie – despite the fact that you and I have lived decidedly different lives, we share the ideology that family cannot be placed on the back burner if we expect to have successful relationships with our spouse and children. Yes, financial stability is important, but no job or business can ever take the place of family.
In our house, food is also the common denominator. I sacrifice my size 8′s for a family sit down at home. It’s worth every inch of elastic added to my expanding waistline!
We also embrace technology here. Even when we can’t manage face time, we text, IM and email personal messages and share photos — just to stay in touch. It works!
Sonia- I love hearing of your family times through FB and the dedication to your family in our conversations. To choose to stay close to friends, family, and folks we’ve chosen as family is important…and the Southerner in me says food is always a part of the gathering!
Thanks for commenting!
hugs,
Sweetie